snow globe

 

 

I decorated another family's Christmas tree

while said family members were putting out garbage,

cleaning the fridge, doing dishes, brushing teeth for bed etc

I rooted through boxes of ornaments

representing a collection of years

kids, frenzy, fury, gut laughter, loss, gain.

 

So like a voyeur

I inspected these small personal reserves:

 

painted play dough star, "Christmas 2001",

little green and red train,

styrofoam dove,

red snowflake made out of popsicle sticks and yarn,

felt Christmas cowboy boot,

tiny wooden record player,

glass icicle,

fancy rocking horse with missing leg.

 

The typical nostalgia came

funny the way the mind rewinds,

and suddenly I'm eight stringing popcorn and cranberries

on a string,

playing trivial pursuit listening to Oscar Peterson,

drinking gingerale punch stealing handfuls of ritz crackers,

wondering what the adults are laughing so hard at,

sneaking a sip of sherry

gag

wearing my over sized Oilers jersey

to my knees no.99

over 2 sweaters nan knit me

skating circles on circles,

on circles

on the backyard rink

till I couldn't feel my face -

not caring one

bit.

 

Someone said to me yesterday

to my eyes

dead on:

"I hate Christmas".
 I saw the soreness

that takes over,

 

and in my own way
i get it...

 

 You can't run around your whole life

with your mittens all encrusted with ice.